All that training has come in handy

Several people have told me that they can't believe, on outward appearances anyway, how well I've been handling all of this.  I don't think I'm particularly strong, brave, or stoic.  I do think I've received some pretty good training and preparation.  Four natural childbirths helps you learn how to deal with pain.  And I don't have just the four natural childbirthing experiences to draw from; I have four labor preparation classes to draw from as well.  Yep, four.  We attended labor preparation classes for each one of the children.  I don't think my husband ever realized that most people don't do that, that most people sign up for one series and maybe an abbreviated refresher course.  Not us.  I wanted to spend as much special time preparing for the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th children as we did for the 1st.  I also figured I would learn something new in each class, and I did.  So I just kept signing us up, and DH just kept attending with me.

At the time, I don't think I ever considered that all of that training would come in handy for anything other than childbearing.  But I really think it has.  When I'm in pain, I do a mighty fine job at closing my eyes, focusing, breathing slowly, and releasing tension in the area that is tight as a knot. 

Anyway, yesterday and today, I ate my special soup and homemade yogurt with NO abdominal pain whatsoever.  Eating without pain has been wonderful!  Something we all tend to take for granted, but something I no longer do.  And I haven't had tissue loss for several days.  Yay!

Of course, to continue with the freakiness of all of this, I'm dealing with a new development.  I am quite certain that now I have either proctitis (rectal ulcers and inflammation), which is colitis' cousin, or slightly less likely an anal yeast infection (which could have resulted from being on antibiotics for FIVE weeks).  It's pretty miserable.  My poor body has stopped spewing pretty white chunks of tissue (from the colitis) and has started spewing ugly lagoons of bloody mucous.  One time, I was lying down resting and it just started streaming out of me.  Before, something like that surely would have caused great alarm.  Now, I'm so resigned that I simply sigh and say "ooo-kaaay".  Sometimes it is so intensely sore and swollen that I wonder if it's possible for a rectum to burst.  I'm trying to think positively - that perhaps whatever has been happening in my body is in the process of moving OUT, but I'll wait for time to tell, I guess.

No, I'm not calling the doctor at this point.  Unless they end up telling me I have colon or rectal cancer, I'm going to try doing as much as I can on my own.  I've done lots of reading, and I'm going to proceed treating myself as if it's proctitis and yeast, and at least getting relief from either of these conditions seems to be generally more promising than it does from IBD.

TMI?  Occassionally, it feels like too much information for me too!  I have a much more intimate relationship with my colon and rectum than I ever thought possible.  It's not a relationship I was looking to forge.  

And now. . .I'm off to make my tea - my special Brassica green tea with supposed special antioxidant SGS extracted from broccoli, topped off with some "really raw" honey that went straight from the hive to the jar.  I'd be so sad without my tea!